My senpai!! 💚💛❤️

So there is this girl that I have been obsessing over, she knows I do because she does too! Her name is Bonnie Pueschel, she lives in Colorado. She is basically a girl version of me, which is weird but that's okay.

We met online. More like I viewed her profile, and commented on a pic. she was in a prom dress and the angle the camera was aimed, she kinda looked like Jennifer Lawernece. So I told her... She didnt believe me, of course, so we started talking from there, discussing music, bands, likes and dislikes, and just talked about our life stories. I found out that on an emotionally scale she was exactly like me... We've helped each other through a lot, when either me or her would have a rough day. We talk it out and forget about it happening.. Whenever she didn't feel well, we used skype and we'd talk for hours everyday.

I've known Bonnie for almost two years and I know her more than anyone else, which is surprising because we hadn't know each other long. We spilled our secrets, our past relationships, and our fears. I won't say what any of those are because ykno it's a privacy thing

But as time went by, talking to her everyday, I realized I was crushing on her but where I'm too shy, I never told her. She told me later that she felt the same way. Yeah I know what your thinking, why crush on someone miles and miles away. Well to be honest I don't care what people think about LDRs. 

Bonnie and I are currently planning in seeing each other in person this summer. My mom is kinda agreeing to letting me go, because she's off for 2 weeks sometime in the summer. 

I know the title says "my senpai", that's because me and Bonnie gave each other like cute little nicknames, like she calls me "bae" and I call her "senpai" 

Please don't judge xD 

BELOW HERE IS MY SENPAI!! 💚💛❤️

 

CoD championship 2015

I watched a 30 minute video of Call of Duty Advanced Warfare. It was a championship match and what caught me was the communication and teamwork of each team member.

 They were all talking fast and sporadic. They played through several different matches.. I don't remember exactly what matches they played but I just remember the voices speaking over one another.

Hatred of winter

I honestly hate winter, yeah granted it's most of the year and it's a beautiful time of year but I'm tired of the cold. Me, I'm more of a summer type person because I can handle the heat, the cold I can't. It's annoying how in the middle of winter, you're sleeping in your nice and toasty bed, then boom, your alarm clock goes off. Making you get out from underneath the warm and cozy blankets to the cold harsh air... Just gives me shivers thinking about it... 

I don't like winter because everyday I heard "Go bundle up!" "Wear layers!" "Put on a jacket!" From dearest mother and it eventually got on my nerves to hear that everyday... I'm pretty sure someone agrees with me! 

Being bundled up in 23 different layers of clothing is suffocating! When it came to winter, my mom always told me to replace my sneakers with boots, my sweatshirts with big, fluffy jackets, replacing snapbacks with beanies, although I wear beanies year round. 

But seriously winter is annoying and it needs to stop... But it won't sadly 

Deep thought

You ever get that feeling where you're just in a thought, then you start going deeper into the meaning? It's weird right? Cause then you start thinking about why things were actually called that.... Like, why is a banana called a banana? Who came up with "words"

I've been like that, and if just be lost or a few seconds and have no clue how to even answer what I just imagined... Still weird right? You with me so far right? 

Good because I lost my place, just kidding. But you catch my drift right? 

You wonder it's purpose and why it's even pronounced the way it is.... You wonder so much about it literally become confusing an you for get about it and pretend it never happened

That one song

Everyone has that one song that either brings back one good memory or 1000 bad ones. The song that brings memories back for me is "And The Snakes Start To Sing - Bring Me The Horizon"

The song questions the relationship of you and your other half. What I mean is that after the break up, you question the intentions of what s/he wanted in the relationship. You wonder if they actually wanted something with you or if they just wanted a fling. You question all of what you and that person had been through, you start questioning yourself as a person and wonder if every person you meet will eventually hurt you.

When the two of you were together, you poured out your heart to that one person and now you just feel horrible that you let that one person in, only to find out that they basically destroyed you emotionally and you feel like you couldn't trust yourself to let anyone else in.